Because of

Cheaters may cheat because of

trauma, unresolved pain, insecurities,

or emotional dysfunction.

But understanding why they cheated does not erase the damage they

caused. And it is not your job to heal them or become their therapist.

Never forget: you know have trauma caused by the very person who

says they cheated because of their own trauma. Yet the cheater only

focuses on their pain while ignoring the pain they created in you.

And you, the betrayed, often become so focused on understanding the

cheater's wounds that you stop paying attention to your own.

In the end, both of you can end up sympathizing with the one who

betrayed the relationship...while the one trying to understand, forgive,

and hold everything together becomes emotionally neglected, blamed,

or even bullied.

And worse, you, the betrayed, end up helping the cheater continue

traumatizing you.