Cruel way

Silent treatment is one thing my spirit 

can't handle anymore. What a cruel way

to treat people that you claim to love.

Don't owe

 A lot of people hide

behind I don't owe

anyone anything. But you

do owe integrity. If you

caused harm, you owe an

apology. If someone

supported you, you owe

gratitude. If you

disrespected someone,

you owe accountability.

~ThirdEyeThirst

Did not even know

 You are getting ready to see

God deliver results

you did not even know

how to pray for.

Pain

 Never wish them pain. 

That's not who you

are. If they caused

you pain, they must

have pain inside.

Wish them healing.

That's what they need.

~Najwa Zebian

Unseen

 From Malika TV

"When a person grows up feeling unseen, they learn to love by over-giving."

They pour into everyone else, endlessly, instinctively, hoping that one day someone will finally notice the emptiness they've been carrying. They give time, energy, patience, loyalty, understanding - often at the expense of themselves. Not because they don't need it, but because they learned early that love had to be earned, not received freely.

So they became the caretaker.

The fixer.

The emotional anchor.

The one who shows up no matter how tired they are, no matter how little they're given in return.

They read the room. Anticipate needs. Carry emotional weight that was never theirs to hold. They stay longer than they should, try harder than they must, and forgive more than is healthy - because somewhere deep inside, they believe that being useful is the same thing as being loved.

And the hardest part?

They aren't trying to be strong.

They aren't trying to be selfless heroes.

They're just waiting.

Waiting for someone to finally do for them what they've spent their entire life doing for everyone else.

Waiting to be chosen without having to prove their worth.

Waiting to be poured into without first emptying themselves.

That kind of love isn't loud or demanding - it's quiet, exhausted, and hopeful. And when someone like that finally receives real, reciprocal care, it changes everything.

My therapist told me:

"When a person grows up feeling

unseen, they learn to love by

over-giving. They pour into everyone

else, hoping that, one day, someone

will finally pour back into them. So

they become the care taker. The fixer.

The one who shows up, even when no

one shows up for them." And thhe

hardest part? Deep down, they're not

trying to be strong. They're just

waiting for someone to do for them

what they've spent their whole life

doing for everyone else.

Prayed

 She didn't know what to do. So she prayed.

Still hope

There is still hope, child of God. I 

know it feels like a never ending

battle. I know the nights are long and

the days are tiring, but your dawn is

coming. There is hope in each new

morning that maybe...it will be the 

day you have been praying for. Each

sunrise is the chance for a brand new 

beginning. Maybe this will be the day

it all changes. Don't give up. You're

closer than you know. 

Never question

 If you could see what God

sees, you would never

question your beauty again.

Get away with

From Pretty Girls Pray

God won't let them get away with what they did

to you. He knows. But it's not up to you to get

revenge or force an apology. God will handle

them. He will prepare the table. You better

believe God's gonna protect and restore you

right in front of those who hurt you. 

Don't know how

 I don't know how to be

not in love with you.

~Christopher Whitney

Be

 This hit harder when I realized it was from Men Manifesto

Be DANGEROUSLY consistent

Be TERRIFYINGLY reliable

Be ALARMINGLY disciplined

Be STUPIDLY impossible to discourage

Release

 When you release 

expectations from 

people, you also

release their ability

to hurt you.

Freedom

feels lighter.

Left out

 From TobyMac

Being left 

out  is 

sometimes

God's way

of saying

"I didn't want

you there."

Entitled

 There

isn't a 

single person on this

planet who is entitled

to treat

you badly. Remember that.

Very best

 "With Jesus, even in our

darkest moments, the best

remains, and the very best 

is yet to be."

~Corrie ten Boom

Working on him

 From Dian Swann

God was working on your spouse.

While you were going through your fire, GOD had him in HIS fire.

God had to take him through the refining process.

The healing. The restoration. The therapy. The breakthrough.

He had to deal with his trauma.

He had to face his pain.

He had to become WHOLE.

Because God doesn't join two broken people together and call it a kingdom marriage.

He HEALS you both. RESTORES you both.

PREPARES you both.

And then He brings you together - on fire for Him.

The Lord had to complete a great work in him so that when you two come together, you're not just surviving - you're BUILDING the kingdom.

I'm declaring today:

Kingdom marriages that have been delayed, blocked, and attacked -

COME FORTH IN THE MIGHTIEST NAME OF JESUS CHRIST.

The wait is ending.

Your spouse has been in God's fire.

The refining is COMPLETE.

They are READY.

And they are about to FIND YOU.

Compassion fatigue

 From Patrick Weaver

Compassion fatigue is real. As tempting as it might be for the empath or trauma survivor, you have to be careful about jumping into every emotional fight, being the emotional savior or internalizing every emotional war as your own.

Compassion fatigue is the emotional and physical exhaustion that results from the prolonged exposure to the suffering or trauma of others. It's also known as secondary traumatic stress or vicarious trauma, leading to empathy overload, or hyper-empathy, happens when highly sensitive people absorb too many emotions from others, leading to exhaustion, anxiety, burnout, and feeling overwhelmed, like drowning in a sea of feelings. 

This state causes severe emotional, physical, and cognitive exhaustion, often resulting in withdrawal, impaired decision-making, and profound personal/professional disconnection. Your emotional stable and mental health are important, and having clear boundaries for yourself is critical to your safety and wellbeing.

Empathy doesn't mean we have to take ownership or responsibility for the emotional condition or conflict of others. We aren't capable of remaining in constant fight mode, or being constantly emotionally dysregulated without doing harm to ourselves. Sometimes, you just have to say no, remove yourself from highly volcanic environments, take the savior cape off, and recognize the difference between helping someone and hurting yourself, and guard yourself against emotional vampires who constantly suck the empathy out of you.

Empathy is good, but empathy without boundaries isn't. Empathy without boundaries results in compassion fatigue, empathy overload, and dysregulation. If you don't take care of you, you won't be any good to anybody else, including yourself.

Too heavy

 From It's Scary to Remarry

You ask a person to heal what only God can touch.

To fill a void they didn't create.

To carry expectations no human can sustain.

That's when love turns heavy.

That's when connection becomes pressure.

That's when disappointment feels inevitable.

People make beautiful partners...but terrible saviors.

If you skip God and rush into love,

you'll turn a person into your savior.

That's too heavy for any human to

carry.

Shovel

"I've found that

if I pray for God

to move a 

mountain, I 

must be 

prepared to 

wake up next to

a shovel."

~Melissa Bromley Ministries

Unity

 Unity in marriage is not just

a "nice idea" - it's a spiritual

force. That's exactly why the

enemy fights it so hard.

Ten years

 Someone who has her eye

fixed on the fruit ten years

down the road makes 

different decisions than

someone who simply

wants today to be easy.

~Jessica Smartt

Who stayed

So encouraging!

From Camisha Agyel Danso

Vindication for the Wife Who Stayed

The Court of Heaven Has Spoken

There were demonic assignments released to fracture, fatigue, and force your marriage to fail.

Quiet plots. Strategic pressure. Weariness meant to make you quit what God ordained.

But hear this clearly, daughter --

Heaven has been in session.

And verdicts are being passed now.

What the enemy meant to end in divorce

is being rewritten into deliverance.

What was meant to humiliate you

is turning into double honor.

You were patient when you could have walked away.

You prayed when your voice shook.

You stayed aligned when no one clapped.

You covered your home while under fire.

And God saw everything.

This is recompense season.

This is restoration with interest.

This is honor for the woman who didn't retaliate - she interceded.

The same mouths that spoke against your covenant

will witness God vindicate you.

The same season meant to break you

will announce you as trusted, favored, and rewarded.

"For your shame you shall have double honor." - Isaiah 61:7

Prophetic declaration:

I receive Heaven's verdict.

I receive double honor.

My patience was not wasted.

My prayers were not ignored.

God has ruled in my favor.

If this word bears witness - sit with it.

He's not just restoring your marriage...

He's restoring your honor.

Waiting

Waiting.

God asks us to wait -

not because He wants us to suffer

but because He has something much

better in store for us.

The ending of our story isn't what

we think it is.

We see the pain, He sees the plan.

We see the valley, He sees the whole view.

We see the long road, He sees the path

that has us leaning closer into Him.

Sometimes waiting is a gift

we just haven't opened yet.

~ullie-kaye

First place

 Your marriage is the first place the enemy will

strike. Separately, you aren't a threat. Together,

however, with a strong marriage built on the

foundation of Christ, you become dangerous.

This is a marriage that will do incredible things

for the kingdom of God.

Strive to be a threat.

Neither

From LoveSecurely

He's not distant.

He's drowning and doesn't know how to say it.

She's not nagging.

She's scared and doesn't know how to ask for reassurance.

Both need compassion.

Neither is the villian.

Leaving

From Derek Hart

People talk about leaving a relationship like it's a solution.

It's not.

It's a trade.

And most people never slow down enough to feel the emotional pros and cons honestly.

So they leave chasing relief

and are shocked by what follows them.

Here's the part that no one wants to say out loud.

The emotional pros of leaving:

Leaving can bring immediate quiet.

No more explaining.

No more negotiating.

No more waiting to be met.

Your nervous system finally stops bracing.

You get space from the daily micro hurts.

From the disappointment.

From the loneliness that happens even when

someone is right there.

For many people, leaving feels like oxygen.

Like relief.

Like safety returning.

And sometimes, that relief is real and necessary.

But relief is not the same as healing.

The emotional cons of leaving:

Leaving does not just remove pain.

It removes attachment.

And attachment does not dissolve politely.

You lose the shared language.

The inside jokes.

The way your body recognized theirs as home.

You lose the future you were unconsciously rehearsing.

Even when a relationship is painful, it holds

identity.

When you leave, part of you goes quiet.

Another part panics.

Many people are shocked by how lonely freedom feels.

Not because leaving was wrong,

but because attachment doesn't care about logic.

Then there's the question most people avoid:

Did I leave because I was honoring myself

or because I didn't know how long to stay without

losing myself?

If that question isn't answered, it follows you.

It shows up in the next relationship.

In new disappointments.

In the same nervous system reactions with a 

different face.

The emotional pros of staying:

Staying gives you the chance to grow in real time.

Not in theory.

In contact.

You get to learn how you protect yourself.

How you shut down.

How you chase.

How you disappear.

Staying can build depth, resilience and repair

if both people are willing to slow down and face

the hard parts.

When repair happens, it rewires safety in a way no

new beginning can.

The emotional cons of staying:

Staying can slowly hollow you out

if you keep abandoning yourself.

If you're always waiting to be chosen.

Always explaining your pain.

Always hoping this time it will land.

Staying without repair teaches your nervous

system

that love means endurance.

That's not growth.

That's erosion.

The truth most people miss:

Leaving doesn't mean you failed.

Staying doesn't mean you're brave.

What matters is whether you're learning

or repeating.

Are you staying conscious

or staying afraid?

Are you leaving awake

or leaving to escape?

There is no clean choice.

Only honest ones.

Every relationship asks the  same question

eventually.

Can we grow without destroying ourselves 

or each other?

If the answer is no, leaving may be an act of care.

If the answer is yes, staying may be the bravest 

thing you ever do.

But don't confuse relief with resolution.

And don't confuse endurance with love.

The right decision isn't the one that feels good

fastest.

It's the one that leaves you more intact on the other side.

Briskly

 They slipped briskly into

an intimacy from which 

they never recovered.

~F. Scott Fitzgerald

Quieter

the human

she

became 

is quieter.

harder to read.

harder to reach.

she isn't cold.

she

is conserving

what is left.

~@reviveyourroar

Pieces

she is

in pieces

& in progress

at

the 

same time.

she is

not done yet,

& that's

the beauty.

~@reviveyourroar

Coming

 Engagements are coming. Kingdom spouses

are coming. The spirit of the Lord has

spoken. God is blessing kingdom marriages

in this season. Marriages that will flourish

and never give up. Marriages that will

represent Christ's love for us. Many of you

are stepping into your season of God

ordained love, and it'll be so beautiful!

Your light

your light

didn't dim.

it waited

for you

to stop

asking permission

to shine.

to exist.

to take full form.

to let

the inside you

finally match

the outside you.

~@reviveyourroar

Beauty beyond

 I hope you know that you haven't been

forgotten. I know that time is slipping

and it often seems like lie is falling 

apart, but there is beauty beyond what 

the eyes can see. Your best days are

ahead of you, and I pray that something

wonderful happens for you soon.

Your faith

 Sarah waited.

Deborah led.

Esther risked.

Ruth followed.

Mary believed.

Woman of God, your faith

will shape your story, too.

~TobyMac

Unconditionally

 Marriage is an

ongoing, vivid

illustration of

what is costs

to love an

imperfect person

unconditionally.

The same way

Christ has

loved us.

An egg

 From C.S. Lewis

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it 

would be a jolly sight harder for a bird to learn to

fly while remaining in an egg. We are like eggs at

present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being

just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched 

or go bad.

Living house

From C.S. Lewis

Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in

to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can 

understand what He is doing. He is getting the

drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and

so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and

so you are not surprised. But presently He starts

knocking the house about in a way that hurts

abominably and does not seem to make any 

sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation

is that He is building quite a different house from 

the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing

here, putting on an extra floor there, running up 

towers, making courtyards. You thought you were 

being made into a decent little cottage: but He is

building a palace. He intends to come and live in it

Himself."

 

Surprised

Don't be surprised if the

career, the income, the 

relationship, the peace all

show up around the same

time. That's what happens

when life finally matches

the version of you you've 

been building quietly.

Behavior

 From Derek Hart

The biggest lie in relationship advice is this:

We keep obsessing over bad behaviors.

What they said. What they did. What they didn't do. What crossed the line.

Yes, boundaries matter.

Yes, sometimes you must leave harmful behavior.

But here's what almost nobody understands:

Behavior is not the injury.

Behavior is the delivery system.

The real damage happens inside you.

It happens in the split second your chest tightens.

In the drop in your stomach.

In the way your throat locks and your breath gets shallow.

In the panic, the shame, the collapse, the rage that lights up your nervous system before you've even formed a thought.

That is where relationships are won or lost.

Behavior doesn't just exist "out there."

It enters your body.

It becomes sensation.

Sensation turns into emotion.

Emotion turns into meaning.

And meaning becomes the world you live in.

Most couples never touch this level.

They fight about the story.

They argue about what happened.

Your body is already braced.

Fear is already online.

Shame is already whispering.

Loneliness is already screaming.

And here's the brutal truth:

We are completely untrained to repair that.

As a culture, we know how to criticize.

We know how to label toxic behavior.

We know how to demand change.

We know how to say, "You hurt me, so you need to do this."

What we don't know how to do is sit with what that hurt actually did to us.

So we weaponize behavior instead.

We turn pain into accusation.

We turn fear into control.

We turn sadness into criticism.

We turn longing into demand.

And every time we do that, we widen the distance we're desperate to close.

The real work is much scarier.

The real work is turning inward and asking:

What is happening in me right now?

Where do I feel this in my body?

What does this sensation actually need?

Not later.

Not after you've cooled off.

Right in the moment when your system is on fire.

The trembling chest.

The hollow stomach.

The pressure behind the eyes.

The urge to attach or disappear.

That is the truth of the moment.

And then comes the part most people avoid their entire lives:

You reveal it.

Not as blame.

Not as strategy.

Not as a lecture.

But as exposure.

Instead of

"You always ignore me."

You say

"When I feel unseen, my chest tightens and I panic that I don't matter."

Instead of

"You need to stop doing that."

You say
"When this happens, my body collapses and I feel completely alone."

That is not weakness.

That is intimacy.

Because intimacy is not built on controlling behavior.

It is built on letting someone see what their actions touch inside you.

Secure relationships aren't created by perfect communication.

They're created by people who can stay present with their own pain long enough to reveal it without turning it into an attack.

When two people learn this, everything changes.

Arguments slow down.

Defensiveness softens.

Distance loses its grip.

Fear stops running the room.

The nervous system that once braced for impact starts to recognize safety.

So stop searching for better language to describe your partner's flaws.

Stop turning every wound into a task for someone else to fix.

Turn inward.

Find the exact place that hurts.

And have the courage to speak from there.

That is where repair actually begins.

That is where scrutiny is built.

That is where love becomes something your body can finally trust.

Why don't love languages fix anything?

You're nowhere near the right topic.

Value

 From Patrick Weaver

Ladies, I highly suggest that you not yoke up with a man who doesn't know his own value? That includes a man who is insecure, emotionally immature, or spiritually an infant.

Some people have to discover who they are before they show up for a grownup relationship.

A man who doesn't know his own value won't see value from a place of value. That man who knows his spiritual value, his purpose and his destiny value, is not settling and he's not influenced or controlled by things that don't have value, that don't add value to his value, or that don't complement his value. He's not easily swayed, moved or bothered by things that have no value, and he's not prone to drama, chaos or tolerate the devil. He will be responsible to his responsibilities, committed to his commitments and accountable for his actions. He will have Kingdom standards, hold himself and the relationship accountable for Kingdom standards, and he will refuse to go on emotional roller coaster rides because he is confident in who he is and Whose he is. He's not going to be drug (dragged?), he's going to lead, and he can't lead if he or you is flesh-fed.

He loves himself as a temple of the Holy Spirit. He loves his divine inheritance, and he loves the truth because truth is God and love is truth (1 Corinthians 13:6). He's not going to try to impress you by being cute, his cute will be his fruit, first the fruit of the Holy Spirit which is his sword and his protection.

A man who loves himself is not going to try to impress your emotions, like a love bomber does, he's going to test your fruit (Matthew 7:16-17) and test your spirit (1 John 4:1), because he knows value is in the truth, and the fruit, not in cheap words. A man who loves himself is looking for a good things not an unstable thing.

You see, a man can't lead without valuing himself, without loving himself and without being secure within himself. Not a man of God. He's not better than anybody but he's unmistakable. He's what you call a covenant partner. A covenant partner is going to love you like he loves himself...because a ma who doesn't love himself for the divine temple and treasure he is, cannot value or love a wife. "In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself." (Ephesians 5:28).

Don't look for cute, look for fruit that can build empires, fulfill God's plans and defeat the enemy. Don't look for your emotional equal, look for your spiritual match, your divine partner, your soul's inspiration. Two powerful high value people, complement each other they don't complete each other. Ask me how I know.

Carry On!

More verses:

1 Corinthians 13:6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

Matthew 7:16-17 By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit.

1 John 4:1 Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.

Praying for

 From Godly Waiting

The person you're praying for is also praying for you. May you soon collide and put demons to flight. May hell tremble at the sound of your union. The love you're praying for is coming. Heaven will soon rejoice. Generational curses will be broken. Joy will be your portion. Blessings will chase you down. Favor will follow you. Your marriage is coming with purpose!

The cloud

 The rain is coming. Your harvest is

about to bloom suddenly. Overflow and

abundance are here. I can see a cloud.

The cloud is heavy with blessings. Get

ready for God to come through. And the 

spirit of the Lord is saying that God is 

about to use unexpected people to bless

you. It's showing up from unexpected

sources and places. Get ready for a 

heavy downpour from heaven. The Lord

gave me a vision of a waterfall raining

down from heaven to the earth and 

touching his faithful people.

Finally believes

 Love feels different when your

nervous system finally believes you're

not about to be abandoned or

misunderstood.

Certain feeling

 When my man grabs my hand and

leads the way...especially through a 

crowd or across the street, it gives

me a certain feeling I can't explain.

Already entrusted

From Sancitified-ish

We live in a culture that convinces us we're always

one purchase away from feeling fulfilled - a little

newer, a little nicer, a little more impressive...

But Heaven doesn't measure abundance the way

the world does.

God isn't asking us to collect more.

He's asking us to be faithful with what's already in

our hands.

Sometimes the breakthrough we're praying for is

hidden in the things we already own...

the habits we already started...

the relationships already in front of us...

the gifts He's already placed inside us.

We don't need "more" to live a meaningful,

peaceful, purposeful life!

We just need to steward well what God has

already entrusted to us. 

More

 The world says "get more."

God says " steward what I've given."

"More" won't satisfy a heart

that hasn't learned to value "enough."

Independence

 Independence might look strong,

but marriage was never meant

to be self-sufficient.

Needing each other isn't weakness.

It's the design.

Along the way

 From Alyssa Rhoda

Somewhere along the way, we started confusing

distance with maturity. Silence with peace. 

Independence with strength.

But marriage was never meant to be two people

standing back to back, proving they don't need

anyone. Scripture doesn't call it coexistence. It

call it one flesh.

Real intimacy requires vulnerability. It requires

saying, "I need you," and allowing yourself to be

needed in return. Carrying each other's burdens

isn't unhealthy attachment. It's obedience to the

design God created.

When spouses stop leaning on each other, they

don't become stronger. They grow farther apart.

If independence has started to feel lonely, this is

your reminder: needing your spouse isn't a flaw.

It's part of what makes a marriage whole.

Save you too

She doesn't need you 

to promise her Heaven

while she battles

the depths of Hell.

But if you're man 

enough to stay as she

puts out the fires,

she might just save

you too.

~Nicole Lyons

Despite

 Anyone can love

a thing because.

That's as easy 

as putting a penny

in your pocket.

But to love something despite.

To know the flaws and love them too.

That is rare

and pure

and perfect.

Love sounds like

 LOVE SOUNDS LESS LIKE "I

LOVE YOU" AND MORE 

LIKE THIS

"I'm proud of you."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me."

"Take your time I'm not going anywhere."

"I noticed you've been stressed. What can I take off your plate?"

"I saved you the last bite."

"You looked beautiful today."

"I was thinking about what you said earlier."

"How are you really doing?"

"I believe you."

"Your feelings make sense to me."

"Let me handle dinner tonight."

"You make this feel easy."

"I trust your judgment on this."

Aura

 When a woman is in love with

a man, his aura becomes more 

magnetic.

Because she's covering you in prayers.

She's speaking highly of you

everywhere she goes. She's lifting your

name to the world. She's believing in

you, rooting for you.

A man's true glow is ignited by

a woman's love.

Disappear

 From R.M. Drake

Sometimes the people who hurt you don't disappear because they don't care - they disappear because they do. Guilt has a way of turning into distance, of making eye contact feel heavy and words feel dangerous. So they choose silence, not as healing, but as shelter, hoping time will soften what they were too afraid to face.

But avoidance is not remorse, and distance is not accountability. What was broken doesn't heal on its own - it waits. And while they hide from the truth of what they did, you are left holding the weight of it, learning that real closure often comes not from an apology, but from accepting that some people would rather run than repair.

Let Him

 From Cami Cantu

There's a slogan going around that says "LET THEM" but what if we "LET HIM"?

Let Him take what was meant for evil and turn it around for your good.

Let Him turn your sorrows into joy.

Let Him turn your panic into peace.

Let Him turn the prodigal back to his father calling him His beloved.

Let Him take your pain and turn it into purpose.

Let Him heal you of your disease.

Let Him set you at tables in front of your enemies and anoint your head with oil.

"LET HIM" be the God of your family, your future and your fears.

"LET HIM" be the redemption and redeem what's been stolen.

"LET HIM" cause every tongue that rises up against you to be condemned and every tongue that blesses you be blessed.

"LET HIM" is so much better than "LET THEM"

Job didn't "Let them" so called friends blame him, accuse him, and criticize him and tell him what God said but Job knew to "LET HIM" be the voice in his ear and not his friends who were betraying him in his moments of grief.

Job 21:19-20

But I say, "Let Him" punish those sinners themselves until they really feel it. Let God All-Powerful force them to drink their own death from the cup of His anger.

(Actual verses: It is said, "God stores up the punishment of the wicked for their children."

Let him repay the wicked, so that they themselves will experience it! Let their own eyes see their destruction; let them drink the cup of the wrath of the Almighty.)

Don't "Let them" but "Let Him."

And watch them turn around and bless you.

What if

 what if.

what if things

go right.

what if nothing

falls apart.

what if hope

does what it said

it would.

what if dreams

are not tricks,

just places

you

have not

reached yet.

~@reviveyourroar

Both

 From LoveSecurely

He needs space to process his thoughts.

She needs connection to feel safe.

He needs silence to find clarity.

She needs words to trust everything's okay.

Both are valid.

Both matter.

Show up

From Alyssa Rhoda

At some point, love stops being about how you

feel and starts being about how you choose to

show up.

When you see loving your spouse as something

bigger than emotion, your perspective shifts. You

lead with patience instead of pride. Grace instead 

of keeping score. Commitment instead of 

convenience.

Marriage isn't carried by feelings alone. Feelings

change. What lasts is intention, consistency, and

purpose.

When love is rooted there, it becomes steadier,

deeper, and more resilient.

Loving

 When loving your husband or wife

becomes an act of worship,

your perspective shifts.

It is no longer about feelings.

It's about faith, obedience, and purpose.

Too late

 Just when you think it's too late, that's when God

whispers..."We don't use the same watch."

Anointed

 From Cheyenne Traficante

Stop sitting at tables that Jesus would flip

and wondering why your spirit feels heavy.

Some rooms look holy.

Some people quote scriptures.

Some circles say all the right things.

But if your peace is being drained,

your boundaries are being mocked,

and your obedience to God is being questioned...

That's not fellowship.

That's compromise.

Jesus didn't beg to be accepted.

He walked into places that were wrong

and turned them upside down.

So if you keep feeling uncomfortable, convicted, restless,

it might not be the enemy attacking you...

It might be God telling you

it's time to get up from that table.

You don't have to stay where you're shrinking.

You don't have to keep quiet to keep the peace.

You don't have to be loyal to what's costing you your soul.

Sometimes the most anointed thing you can do

is walk away.

Emotionally

 From Women things

This one broke me.

"An emotionally unavailable dad

and an emotionally unstable mom

often create an emotionally intelligent child."

Because that child had to learn early.

How to read moods.

How to stay quiet.

How to mediate chaos they didn't create.

They became observant instead of carefree.

Empathetic instead of protected.

Mature instead of nurtured.

They learned emotional intelligence

not because they were guided,

but because they had to survive.

They became the listener.

The fixer.

The safe one.

That kind of intelligence is earned through

absence,

not teaching.

And while it looks admirable,

it often comes at the cost of their own unmet

needs.

That child didn't grow up fast by choice.

They adapted.

And adaptation is not the same as being okay.

This one broke me.

An emotionally unavailable

dad and an emotionally

unstable mom often create an

emotionally intelligent child.

Guys

GUY'S LOVE LANGUAGE

• When he goes quiet, don't force words. Stay close. Your presence is louder than questions.
• When he opens up, listen like it's sacred. Men don't offer vulnerability twice.
• When he's stressed, remind him he doesn't have to be strong with you.
• When he avoids eye contact, gently lift his chin. Being seen heals more than advice.
• When he jokes too much, remember -- laughter is sometimes pain wearing a mask.
• When he holds you tighter, he's asking for comfort without words.
• When he shares his dreams, believe in them. A man runs on faith before results.
• When he stays silent after an argument, he's protecting his pride, not his love.
• When he does small things, notice them. That's his love language.

 

In love

 You know y'all really in love when y'all can't be friends on social media.

Plot twist

I hope you get a plot twist --

and I hope it's really beautiful.

Like a new beginning.

Or a second chance.

Or the miracle you hoped for

but never really expected.

I hope everything changes

and that light seeps in somehow.

I hope you see things start to unfold.

I hope your soul undergoes a deep

cleansing and all of the unnecessary

things are finally washed away.

And I hope that the new you always

remembers to thank the old you for

holding on when holding on wasn't easy.

I hope God hugs you in ways

you never imagined.

~ullie-kaye

Greatest act

You ask me, "What's the greatest act of faith?" 

To me is to look in the mirror of God's word, and

see all my faults, all my sin, all my shortcomings

and to believe that God loves me exactly as He

says He does.

~Paul Washer

Future you

 there is a future you

that is so grateful

you didn't give up.

~TobyMac

Worth fixing

I don't know which one of us broke it,

but I know which one of us decided 

that it wasn't

worth

fixing.

~Kristina Mahr

God hates

From Chris Durso

God hates divorce because He loves people. He also hates what slowly destroys a marriage long before it ends. Truth brings clarity. And clarity is where healing begins.

Yes, God hates divorce.

He also hates when a spouse is

Lazy

Manipulative

Deceptive

Unfaithful

Emotionally absent

Verbally abusive

Chronically selfish

Spiritually negligent

Financially irresponsible

Unrepentant

Controlling

Unwilling to grow

And, when they break their vows to love,

serve, protect and sacrifice.

Too often the Church speaks loudly about divorce but too quietly about what makes someone want to give up.

His table

When you realize God's invited you

to His table, it no longer matters 

who doesn't invite you to theirs.

~TobyMac

Never

When I ask people

when they really 

grew spiritually,

they never describe

an easy time. Never.

~Chuck Swindoll

Stop praying

From Abednego Lufile

STOP PRAYING FOR YOUR MARRIAGE TO "WORK"

Many people pray for outcomes while God is targeting the root. You ask God to make the marriage work, but God is after repentance. You ask God to bring them home, but God is dealing with what would follow them back through the door.

The problem is not distance. It's disobedience.

God does not restore environments. He is actively judging. He restores hearts first. If a spouse returns without repentance, the same spirits, patterns, and rebellion return with them, and the marriage becomes a cycle of endurance instead of covenant.

Scripture reveals that order in marriage flows from submission to God, not emotional attachment or physical proximity.

Ephesians 5:21: Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

A spouse cannot honor covenant while resisting the God who authored it. That is why prayers focused only on reunion often go unanswered. God is not ignoring you. He is refusing to bypass the process.

Spiritual warfare does not cancel free will. God will convict, expose, and call, but He will not force repentance. If the captivity is not broken at the heart level, bringing them home only relocates the bondage.

Stop praying for relief when God is calling for repentance. Pray that the grip of sin would break. Pray that submission to God would be restored. When the heart aligns, the marriage can follow.

Light and salvation

From Faithful Grace

Lord, you are my light and my salvation, which means I have nothing to fear, no reason to be afraid when You illuminate my path and secure my soul.

In darkness, You are the light that shows me where to step, and in danger, You are the salvation that rescues me from what threatens to destroy.

Teach me to run to You as both my light and my salvation, not dividing them but receiving them together, guidance and rescue from the same faithful God.

When I can't see the way forward, You light the path, and when I can't save myself, You provide the rescue, covering every need I have.

Help me remember that light and salvation aren't just things You give but who You are to me, my constant source of direction and deliverance.

Remind me that with You as mu light, I don't stumble in darkness, and with You as my salvation, I don't need to fear what threatens me.

Give me confidence to walk through dark valleys and face real dangers, knowing that the Lord who is my light will guide me and the Lord who is my salvation will protect me.

Let me live today without fear, anchored in the truth that the Lord is my light and my salvation, and with You, I have everything I need.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.

The Lord is my light and

my salvation.

Blocked

Even the Bible says that finding a wife brings blessing to a man

 but the moment he mistreats her, all of his blessings get blocked!

Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.

1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

Rid of

 People sometimes ask me, "How did you

get rid of your feelings?" I tell them:

"I didn't get rid of them. I offer them to

God, and I have to offer them again, and

again, and again."

~Elisabeth Elliot

Hate on

 I've never seen a strong and

confident person hate on another.

It's always the insecure and

miserable ones who can't handle

someone else's glow.

Night shift

Let God

work the

night shift.

Don't spend 

another 

sleepless

night trying

to solve

all your 

problems.

From TobyMac

Closer

 I saw a quote that read:

"Sadness that brings you closer to

God is better than happiness that

pulls you further away."

...and now I can't unknow that.

Say no

You 

can

love

people 

and

still 

say 

no

From TobyMac

Changed everything

 I stopped asking

"why"

and started saying

"I trust You."

That changed everything.

One thing

 One thing about God, He'll let the scene play out.

He'll let them mock, lie & gossip. Then bless you in

a way that makes them choke on their own words.

"Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord" (Romans 12:19)

Be still & let God fight your battles.

God knows

 God knows who is destroying my

life silently, but I stay calm, trusting

Him fully, because nothing hidden

lasts forever and justice finds its

way at the right time always.

~@zeeshannaveedgul

Slaves to lies

 Man to man:

Most men are slaves to lies:

P*rn isn't pleasure.

Alcohol isn't joy.

Junk food isn't fuel.

Drugs aren't peace.

Smoking isn't calm.

Social media isn't love.

Anything that controls you is never comfort, it's a cage. 

A man rises the moment he stops feeding what weakens him.

Don't need to end

 From Anthony D. Brice

Some relationships don't need to end. They need to start over. Not because the love wasn't real. But because the version of you that started it, isn't the version you are now. A season of disconnection doesn't always mean it's over forever. Sometimes it means both people needed space to grow without pulling each other apart in the process. We treat distance like it's a death sentence. Sometimes starting over is the only way to move forward. Not back to who you were. Not back to old patterns. But forward, with clearer boundaries, better language, deeper understanding. Some love has to be reintroduced. Relearned. Rechosen.

Over-giver

 From Derek Hart

There's a trap almost nobody talks about.

It's the trap of the over-giver.

And if you're in it, you don't see yourself as part of the problem. You see yourself as the one holding everything together while everyone else disappoints you.

From the inside, it feels noble. It feels generous. It feels moral.

From the inside, it feels like this: "I care more than other people." "I notice things others don't." "I give without keeping score." "I show up." "I don't ask for much."

And slowly, quietly, another belief starts forming underneath all of that.

"Most people are selfish."

Here's the painful part most over-givers don't want to look at.

Over-giving isn't generosity. It's a coping strategy.

Not a conscious one. Not a manipulative one. A survival one.

Most over-givers learned very early that having needs felt dangerous. Needing too much meant being a burden. Asking directly mean risking rejection. Waiting to be chosen meant waiting forever.

So they adapted.

They learned to give first. They learned to anticipate. They learned to sense what others needed before anyone asked. They learned to become useful. They learned to become indispensable.

And here's the quiet trade they made with life:

"I won't asl for what I need. I'll give you what you need. Maybe someday you'll notice."

But someday rarely comes.

Because the over-giver doesn't just struggle to ask. They don't know how to receive.

Not really.

Care hits their system and doesn't land. Compliments slide off. Offers feel awkward. Support feels foreign. Rest feels undeserved.

Their body doesn't know what to do with being held.

So love never fully soaks in. It never marinates. It never settles into the bloodstream.

Which means no matter how much they give, they still feel empty.

And instead of seeing the pattern, the mind does something very human.

It looks outward.

"These people are selfish." "No one ever shows up for me." "I give and give  and no one gives back." "People only take."

Sometimes that's true. Sometimes they really are surrounded by people who take.

But here's the part that stings.

Over-givers often attract takers.

Not because they want to. Because the system fits.

The person who doesn't know how to receive finds someone who doesn't know how to stop taking. The person who avoids asking pairs with someone who avoids offering. The person who gives endlessly pairs with someone who never learned to notice.

And both feel justified.

The over-giver feels resentful and unseen. The taker feels confused and entitled. Neither feels truly met.

Over time, the over-giver becomes bitter. They start keeping score even while telling themselves they don't. They start pulling away while still doing everything. They start giving with an edge. They start feeling morally superior and deeply lonely at the same time.

They don't feel loved. They feel used.

And here's the hardest truth in this whole pattern.

The over-giver isn't actually protecting themselves from pain. They're guaranteeing it.

Because real intimacy requires risk. It requires asking. It requires letting someone see you want something. It requires tolerating the discomfort of receiving and not earning it.

And none of that lives inside over-giving.

Over-giving keeps you safe from rejection. And it keeps you cut off from being known.

So yes, there are selfish people in the world. And yes, some people really do take too much.

But if you're an over-giver, the deeper work isn't figuring out how to stop attracting selfish people.

It's learning how to sit with the terror of saying: "I need." "I want." "I can't give anymore." "I want you to choose me without me earning it."

That's not selfish. That's intimacy.

And until that happens, the over-giver will keep giving to people who can't love them the way they need. And keep believing the world is the problem.

When the truth is quieter and harder and more hopeful than that.

Love didn't fail you.

You were never taught how to let it in.

Read these slowly.

Mirror Meditation: 25 Ways to Heal Over-giving

1. Look at yourself and say, "I don't need to give anything right now to be allowed to be here."
2. Place a hand over your chest and notice how uncomfortable it feels to receive your own attention.
3. Say, "It makes sense that receiving feels hard. This is learned, not a flaw."
4. Breathe and let the urge to perform, explain, or offer something pass without acting on it.
5. Notice how your body braces when you imagine asking for help.
6. Say, "I'm allowed to want something without earning it first."
   
7. Sit with the feeling of need without solving it.
8. Let your shoulders drop and notice how unfamiliar rest feels.
9. Say, "I don't have to be useful to be loved."
10. Notice the guilt that arises when you imagine saying no.
11. Say, "Guilt is a sensation, not a command."
12. Feel your feet on the ground and remind yourself you're safe even when you don't give.
13. Say, "I can survive disappointing someone."
14. Imagine receiving care and notice where your body tightens.
15. Stay with that tightness without pushing it away.
16. Say, "Receiving won't harm me, even if it feels foreign."
17. Let yourself feel the grief of how long you've given without being met.
18. Say, "It hurts to realize how much I needed and didn't get."
19. Place a hand on your stomach and breathe slowly into it.
20. Say, "My needs are not excessive. They're human."
21. Notice the urge to minimize what you feel and choose not to.
22. Say, "I can learn to let care land, one moment at a time."
23. Sit quietly and allow your body to experience being held by your own presence.
24. Say, "I'm allowed to take up emotional space."
25. End by saying, "I'm learning how to receive. I don't have to rush."

This practice isn't about becoming less caring. It's about becoming reachable to care.

Over-giving didn't come from too much love. It came from not having a place to put it.

You're building that place now.

Enough

 When Adam was alone,

God gave him Eve.

Not porn.

Not a mistress.

Not multiple women.

Just Eve.

Your wife is enough.

Bad season

From Alyssa Rhoda

Marriage isn't ruined because it's hard right now.

It's not broken just because you're tired, hurt, 

disconnected or discouraged.

Every marriage has a season that feels heavy.

Seasons where communication is off. Seasons

where love feels quiet. Seasons where you wonder

if this is just how it's always going to be.

But feelings are loud liars when they're hurting.

A bad week doesn't erase years of history.

A rough season doesn't cancel a lifetime of vows.

And a moment of emotion shouldn't be the thing

that decides a permanent ending.

Pause before you quit.

Breathe before you decide.

Give your marriage the grace to grow instead of 

the pressure to be perfect.

Some of the strongest marriages weren't the ones

that never struggled.

They were the ones that didn't walk away while

the storm was passing.

If you're in a hard season, this is your reminder:

don't let a temporary feeling write the last chapter.

A bad season doesn't mean

a bad marriage. Don't let 

a temporary feeling write

a permanent ending.

Safe

 From Derek Hart

The moment your nervous system decides your

partner is no longer safe.

And why love doesn't disappear. It goes offline.

There is a moment in every distressed relationship

that almost no one can point to.

It doesn't happen during the big fight.

It doesn't happen when someone storms out.

It doesn't even happen when harsh words are said.

It happens quietly.

It happens inside the body.

It's the moment your nervous system stops

expecting care.

Not because you decided anything.

Not because you made a conclusion.

But because your body ran the math faster than

your mind ever could.

Something didn't land.

Something wasn't repaired.

Something hurt and stayed alone.

And the body took notes.

I've sat with couples who swear they still love each

other.

They say it with sincerity.

They mean it.

But when they look at each other, there's a

flatness.

A distance.

A vigilance that didn't used to be there.

Their words say love.

Their bodies say danger.

Here's what most people don't understand.

Love doesn't leave first.

Safety does.

The nervous system is not interested in romance.

It's interested in survival.

It asks very simple questions, over and over again.

When I reach for you, do I get soothed or

punished?

When I show pain, do I get met or dismissed?

When I'm overwhelmed, do you slow down or 

speed me up?

If the answers start stacking up the wrong way,

something profound happens.

The nervous system pulls the plug.

Not dramatically.

Not consciously.

It just stops bringing the other person forward as a

source of comfort.

I once worked with a couple who couldn't

understand why everything felt cold.

They hadn't betrayed each other.

They hadn't screamed.

They hadn't crossed any obvious lines.

But they missed hundreds of small repairs.

Moments where one person said, "That hurt," and

the other explained instead of stayed.

Moments where emotion showed up and logic

answered.

Moments where the body needed closeness and

got distance.

Nothing explosive.

Just cumulative.

And one day, the body decided, without asking

permission,

"Don't lean here anymore."

That's when people start saying things like:

"I don't feel the same."

"I don't know what happened."

"I love you but I'm not in love with you."

What they really mean is:

"My nervous system no longer recognizes you as

safe."

That is why trying harder doesn't work.

Because effort doesn't rebuild safety.

Attunement does.

And here's the most painful part.

When safety goes offline, memory goes with it.

People tell me, "I can't even remember the good 

times."

That's not cruelty.

That's biology.

The brain stops retrieving warm memories about

people it's tracking as threatening.

So now the partner feels foreign.

Irritating.

Suspicious.

Even neutral behaviors get interpreted as attacks.

And the couple panics.

They talk more.

Explain more.

Analyze more.

Which only convinces the nervous system that

danger is increasing.

Because safety isn't restored through 

understanding.

It's restored through experience.

Through moments where pain is met and not

fixed.

Where emotion is allowed to exist without being

corrected.

When the body feels, "I can be here and not be 

harmed."

Until that happens, love doesn't disappear.

It just can't come online.

And no amount of communication skills can

override that.

Seven signs your nervous system has marked your partner as unsafe:

1. You brace internally before they speak
2. You feel relief when they're gone
3. Their tone bothers you more than their words
4. You replay old hurts automatically
5. Physical closeness feels effortful
6. You assume negative intent quickly
7. You feel lonely even when you're together

Seven things that slowly turn safety off:

1. Pain explained instead of felt
2. Defensiveness during vulnerable moments
3. Repair attempts that come too late
4. Emotional speed mismatches
5. Chronic invalidation, even subtle
6. Being right more than being present
7. Hurt that never gets named together

Seven experiences that turn safety back on:

1. Someone slowing down with your pain
2. Emotion being mirrored, not managed
3. Repair happening while it still hurts
4. Silence that doesn't feel abandoning
5. Accountability without justification
6. Feeling chosen when you're not at your best
7. Your body relaxing before your mind agrees

This is why couples don't fall apart from one fight.

They fall apart from the moment the body stops reaching.

And healing doesn't begin with better words.

It begins when two nervous systems learn, again, how to recognize each other as home.