Toxic

 Somebody said, toxic is not only

when they are bad to you. Toxic is

when they are bad to you on some

days and good to you on others.

It's when they are so inconsistent

with their love that you spend

most of your time wondering if

you should stay or leave.

It's the unpredictable swings that keep you constantly second-guessing yourself, always trying to read the signs, always on edge. One moment they are warm. affectionate, and seemingly devoted; the next, they are distant, cold, or outright cruel. That inconsistency chips away at your sense of reality, leaving you exhausted from trying to navigate the emotional rollercoaster they've created.

It's when they are so inconsistent with their love that you spend most of your time wondering if you should stay or leave. You find yourself replaying every interaction, analyzing every word, and trying desperately to find patterns that might help you predict their behavior. You hope that the next gesture of kindness signals a lasting change, only to be disappointed when the next outburst or withdrawal occurs. You become hyperaware of every mood shift, every tone of voice, every glance - as though survival depends on anticipating their next move.

This type of toxicity is uniquely destructive because it erodes your trust in yourself. You start questioning your judgment, your perceptions, and even your emotional reactions. Are you too sensitive? Are you overreacting? Are your needs unreasonable? The push-and-pull dynamic convinces you that stability is the exception rather than the rule, and that maybe, just maybe, if you try harder, you can "earn" the good days consistently.

The emotional whiplash also keeps you tethered to hope. Even in moments of pain, you cling to the fleeting moments of care, affection, or attention as proof that change is possible, that the person you fell for still exists somewhere beneath the instability. That hope is what keeps you staying longer than you should, because leaving a person who alternates between love and neglect feels like abandoning the very possibility of love itself.

Toxicity is just overt abuse or cruelty -- it's the slow, relentless undermining of your emotional stability. Real love doesn't keep you guessing, doesn't demand constant recalibration, and doesn't make you fear that your happiness depends entirely on someone else's mood. Toxic love makes you doubt yourself; healthy love reminds you of your worth. And that difference, as subtle as it may seem, is what ultimately determines whether a relationship nurtures your soul or drains it dry.