Memorial Day

I was thinking in church the other day about how people who died for our freedom are honored on Memorial Day. That is not a new thought, but the freedoms they provided for us are, unfortunately, temporary.

That made me wonder if in heaven there is an equivalent honor for Christians whose death resulted in many, many people coming to Christ and resulting in eternal freedom/pardon from sin (like your death). Even though it wasn't voluntary like military service is, knowing the risks, but we as Christians commit our lives to Christ and ask Him to use us how he sees fit. Even though you and we wouldn't choose this (I don't think soldiers and their families would choose to die either), it happened nonetheless and great good can and did come from it.

If this is the case, how much more would you be exalted for eternity? The greatest reward of it, of course, is seeing that many more people in heaven because of you, but maybe there is extra special honor bestowed on you for giving up your life so that others may have eternal life. I am not trying to exalt you to Christ-like status, but it could be the same idea.

This thought brought tears to my eyes and I couldn't even get through the first hymn which was "Amazing Grace" (it didn't help that we sung that at your service). Then the last verse was sung a cappella which gets me anyway when it's sung to music, so I pretty much cried the whole time.

Something else Memorial-Day-related: On the way to church, Hope told me that Jake went to the lake house this weekend. I was really happy to hear that, but Hope said she already told me that over the weekend and I reacted to it, which I don't remember at all. I don't know if that was more disturbing that I don't remember her telling me or the thought that it upset me a little that Jake is getting over you. I want him to, of course. It's a weird feeling though. Like I don't want him to be able to have fun without you. How horrible of me to think that! He's been through so much! I sent him a nice text which he didn't reply to. Oh, well. Maybe it was hard to reply to. I just told him how happy I was to hear that he went to the lake house and that you would have been proud of him and so am I. I tried.

I also really wanted to go to your (hate the word grave) earthly place (where you aren't even really are). Anyway, I just felt the need to clean up since the cemetery would be pretty busy on Memorial Day and I didn't want that spot to look neglected. The whole time I was there pretty much I heard the cooing of your mourning dove. I wiped everything down with a wet rag I found in one of the vases there and went down to Laura Jack's grave and wiped the bird poop off of her headstone. When I came back, there was something on the clock Dad left and when I tried to brush it off it was a little toad! He hung around for a little while. It made me think of the toad that was in the house at Halloween which was SO weird and SO YOU!

Another special thing that happened was, as I was leaving, I took one last look towards your spot and there was a light that was on from one of the solar lanterns. It wasn't even that dark and no other ones were on but that little angel lantern one. It was very comforting. Thank you for that! Love you!