How much time

From Flying Free FB post

How much time do you spend thinking about the narcissist? For some people, it's all about jealousy and revenge, for others, it's remembering what seemed like good times before they realized they were dealing with a narc. It's hard to let go even when we've been hurt.

Our lives became entangled with a toxic person-either through birth or dating or marriage and part of that poison is the struggle to get them out of our minds. We've been told that we are to love our mothers and romantic love is supposed to last forever, so what can we do when loving them is hurting us?

The truth we must embrace to move on is that whatever we thought we had with the narcissist, it wasn't real. Sure it felt real, but it was just a fantasy. They created a persona that we embraced-until we woke up from a slap in the face.

This is where self talk is very important. If you keep saying I wish I'd never found out the truth, you are betraying yourself. If you keep asking what is wrong with me? You are asking the wrong question-you should be asking what is wrong with the narcissist?

As long as you look back and pine away for what might have been, you are buying into the narc's lies. It's much better to say this is what SHOULD have been, except this narcissist was incapable of a real relationship and love, so thank you, God or the Universe for setting me free!

Once people leave a prison camp, no one looks back with fondness, they get the hell out of there and never fantasize how good it might have been. Spotting the fake, recognizing the lies and moving on to truth and reclaiming your power is your ticket to a new and better life. Hang on for the ride!