It's cold and snowy out-I bet you don't miss winter! Dad has been on my case lately because he says I'm getting "mean" again and he wonders why. I wish he would just leave me alone. I'm stressing out a little because of his new job which he actually doesn't have yet, his decision to start drinking alcohol in our home which he sees nothing wrong with, making the money that we have last until he starts working again, etc.
The good news is we are finally going to get the living/dining/kitchen area drywall fixed and painted. That will be really nice. I'm sorry it always looked so crappy when you lived there. I know you didn't even care though because that's how you are. I am so glad we decided to get your room painted first before everything else so you could enjoy it while you were here. I will never regret that decision even though Dad would always question why you and Hope's rooms were chosen first. Turd.
At least the sun is out. I am also stressing because I have to prep the rooms for painting as far as cleaning out stuff and then dealing with how the kitchen is going to be. Dad is taking down the cabinets on the wall (the ones we would always bump our heads on the doors of) so the drywall/painter guy can paint the whole ceiling and paint the walls to match everything else. It's going to be a pain but the guy says it's only going to take 6 days, so that's not too bad. We have had so many bad experiences with work done in the house, so hopefully this guy is legit. He gave us an amazing price too-$2500 for everything. Someone else quoted us $2100 for only painting. Now the fun part is telling the first guy that we are not going to use him. We did tell him that our main concern was getting the walls properly prepped and he referred us to a drywall place who never answered the phone or returned a message. Oh, well-that's how it goes sometimes. He's kind of been jerky anyway.
I keep thinking I want to reach out to Susie Fay, the lady who was at the scene of your accident, but then I'm not so sure. Part of me wants to know some more details of that day but it might be really hard to hear. I am glad she was there with you during that time. Maybe you can let me know what you think about this.
I passed the accident scene on Saturday when I was taking Carter and Blaise to see "Star Wars". Someone put one of those white wooden crosses (like the one in our yard) by the traffic sign near that turn-off, right before the hill. I thought it was very nice. I found out later that it was Sarah, Allie and Justin who did it just a week or so ago. When I told Grandma Joonie, she said she thought I said I didn't want anything there. It's not really up to me though. Same with your gravesite I guess and the stuff that people leave there. That's between them and you-I shouldn't interfere. My only concern with the marker at the scene is that I didn't want it to turn into something with soggy stuffed animals, fake tacky flowers, etc. It doesn't matter though. People love you so much, Hayden. They need to be able to express that love to you in whatever way they want.
I'm doing ok today. That could change in an hour or even a minute though. Did you hear I went to an exercise class? I tried that RydeOn place behind Saline Inn and Dairy Queen where they do studio cycling. I have been wanting to start some kind of exercise program for a while and it's also supposed to help with grief to relieve stress and to try something new. It went fine. I'm going again tomorrow night and Saturday. I think you would be proud of me. Hope is. I'm proud of me too. It's funny-when I signed up I was more afraid of chickening out than actually going to the class. And it was fine-you can go at your own pace and no one cares (for now at least). When I was walking in, Cindy Barnett was coming out and then Dawn Rudnik was in my class. Gotta love those water polo moms!
I guess that's it for now-not too exciting but it's nice to share just regular things with you instead of composing some insightful, thoughtful statement about God, life or death. Not that the other posts are that great, but this is nice too. Love you so much! Thank you for being you, wonderful you!
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